On the sublime, subpar and ultimately subjective experience of music as a medium.

I rarely share my favourite music with anyone at all. I find it to be my natural defense mechanism against being judged and protecting my own elitist bubble of what it is that I deem worthy of occupying my digital album library. Not entirely aware of it at first, I realised my relationship with music is an intimate one, not one to be ashamed of or kept under covers, but one charged with feelings not to be shared with a random stranger.

Although I realise this sounds like an extreme oxymoron while putting this in an online article to be seen by anyone, the subject occupying my mind lately was: What truly makes me click with music? Why do I treat different artists in their own specific way?

Is authenticity paramount?

In my natural process of deduction I couldn’t answer this question with a yes or no. It’s simply because of so many functions music can have. Mainly, we listen to music for entertainment and through this lens it’s clear that we might not care about an artist’s backstory, integrity or creative process as long as the tune tickles your brain just in the right way for the occasion. At that point, you could already put down a solid “no” as an answer to the posed question.

This may have been true for a long time until AI music hit all platforms. Hours of regurgitated lofi, synth, jazz fusion, dnb, jungle music that has a quirky background image for 3 hour long mixes. YouTube channels that exist for merely 2 months, having 50 of those videos that exist solely to make a quick buck on any trend at the lowest cost possible. In this case I can never disconnect my feelings from listening to something that at least has a human intent and is not an algorithmic calculation of what is averagely “good”. It only disappoints me further that those mixes get an audience. I’d like to believe quite a lot of listeners are oblivious to the scheme, rather than being complacent in generating traffic to their newly picked background music for their day of work.

You can see quite clearly – if you do care – we’re already leaning to the “yes” side. If the basic level of authenticity is a “make or break” even for the background music you could argue it’s enough to confirm it to be an ubiquitous absolute. However, let’s take a step back, because while I would love to brag that I only ever listen to “real” or “authentic” music, I want to give a couple of examples that show the balance between entertainment and appreciation of music as a medium.

The problem of separating art from the artist always comes up, because it has to be brought up whenever you mention someone even slightly polarizing. To me, Deadmau5 can be exactly that kind of artist. While he had said and done things that may be eyebrow raising, I cannot help but be ultimately grateful for a song like Strobe. I am also glad there is no question in my mind whether any of it was an accident, prompt or a malicious lack of talent. It’s simply great and I know the song itself has resonated with millions. The feeling of space, fantastic build ups and the resolution that keeps you high all the way throughout, without typical, sometimes cheap yet satisfying, big bass drops. It’s on the same, now iconic album (“for lack of a better name”, 2009) as Ghosts N Stuff which as popular as it is, is “just” another dance anthem. Not to take away from its credit, but it surely was followed by enough copycats till now, which to me makes it feel slightly dated.

Something about introducing this topic with EDM music just felt right, since it can easily invoke the feelings associated with both entertainment and yet grandeur worthy of stadium-sized dance floors. The real crutch of authenticity to me sits somewhere else though. Somewhere, where you’ll find more elitists than in any other genre bar classical music.

Brazen violence, boring business.

The initial trigger for this post that got me quite stunned and questioning my own reality was the release of the abysmal, irredeemable and absolutely dogshit single by Slipknot – Arsenal. The song is nearly aptly named cause remove the -nal and you’re spot on – just arse. I cannot put into words how unpleasant, uninspired and straight up insulting it feels to listen to this shit.

The situation surrounding Slipknot’s band members has been frustrating to watch, but not entirely surprising given what the band had gone through since the death of Paul Gray and subsequent departure of Joey Jordison. The frustration for me personally comes from the fact, like for many people from my generation, the band was one of the gateway drugs to the extreme and more fringe music. The ever revolving doors in the staffing room of Slipknot in the past couple of years are symptomatic of modern band problems – creative differences, PR dramas and of course money. Also there is this offputting kind of behaviour typical for modern influencers – letting everyone know the decades’ worth of symbiotic, creative cooperation gets snuffed out via an Instagram post. They’re not the first or the last ones to have done it in that way. It doesn’t change the bad taste in your mouth.

As it comes with American media more often than not – rockstars gain notoriety, go on national talk shows to do their piece and then end up on “Mercedes sponsored, Jimmy Kimmel Live!” stage. By itself, it is nothing to be too upset about. It’s called success. You don’t want to be listening to aggressive music from Iowan puking junkies that smell like last week’s, yesterday’s and tomorrow’s hangover, right? Right..?

Although you can totally enjoy all the new stuff, my personal feeling is really one of embarrassment and shame for seeing something you once enjoyed, move into the realm of – “probably never again”.

Most of the time when a new song by a popular band drops, there is a chance that it may not be my cup of tea. The artist also owes you, as a listener, nothing in regards to their own artistic self-expression. In the same vein, you don’t owe the artist anything when expressing your appreciation or disgust with the fruit of their endavours – unless of course you’re in some way personally involved with said musician. The reality of modern music is, fandom and the expectations surrounding new releases do exist. Whether they must be met like demands – definitely not, but I will likely move on if mine are not met. Not that it matters to anyone but my own persuasion.

Shuffling with persistence or stubbornness

The changes in bands happen all the time. The longer the project is going for, the more successful it is, these changes are almost inevitable. And at times you can see generational runs even after someone as fundamental as a vocalist gets replaced.

Whether it’s AC/DC continuing on with Brian Johnson after the untimely death of Bon Scott or Cannibal Corpse parting ways with Chris Barnes making way for one of the most iconic death metal voices of all time, George Fisher – their respective bands have gone on to release genre-defining hits. Changes like these may be welcome from the perspective of time and I have certainly lived long enough after those events to be personally bothered. 

Then there is Mushroomhead, which honestly has one of my favourite nu metal albums – Savior Sorrow. Ironically, it had one of the original vocalists (J Mann) missing from the line up for the first time in the band’s history. And while I enjoyed most of their work, I cannot deny the lineup timeline looks comical as hell.

When Jeffrey Hatrix has left the band though, I knew it was really over for me. What followed, was bitter dispute with Steve Felton who supposedly had taken over the band rather than leading it as a collective, Jeffrey’s journey to be born-again christian, his wife’s death and his own cancer diagnosis. After taking up an alternative, natural-only therapy instead of medicine-typical, debilitating chemo, he’s now in remission (Blabbermouth source) and making music for his own project as Jeffrey Nothing. When events like these permeate the news around the band more than the music or tours they’re on, I’m finding it difficult to keep up with each new iteration and in result, changing musical style. I can still appreciate the music of old and peek into the new releases, although with much less investment and passion than I had as a teenager. Call it disillusionment?

Finally, there are way less fortunte. Those who had to deal with a death of their bandmates or worse, suicide. I’m thinking of Death’s Chuck Schuldiner or Type O Negative’s Peter Steele – the heart and sound of bands that had such an incredible impact on their respective genres. Both bands ceased operation upon the news of each of their vocalists dying, leaving their discography preserved in time as immortal artistic memoirs. I like this quote from an interview with Kenny Hickey (Type O Negative’s guitarist) on Loaded Radio in 2023:

“I think that Peter’s work deserves some kind of celebration. And how that can happen, I really have no idea. But we’ve never seriously considered doing any kind of reunion or putting something out there as Type O Negative without Peter. Peter, his musicianship, his character — without him there, you can’t call it Type O Negative.”

And I truly respect that.

I might ruffle some feathers with this one, but quite the opposite has happened with Linkin Park after Chester Bennington’s suicide. I can’t say I had ever been a follower of the band but inevitably I had listened to quite a few singles from them from time to time. The news was definitely devastating to fans and while the band has always signalled that the hiatus following Chester’s death is not going to last forever, the return of Linkin Park with Emily Armstrong still sits wrong with me.

The new album is entirely up to modern standards. In fact the band seemed to want to reassure fans with creating almost mirror image songs proving their new frontwoman’s vocal prowess as a worthy replacement for Chester. To me, it diminishes their own legacy, needing to show they can reach what used to be their peak. To keep the record straight, there is no issue here with Emily herself and no doubt she will impress on every new record.

Would I mind this even half as much if the band came back under a different name? Probably not. Is it completely hypocritical of me to pick and choose which band gets a pass or not? Likely so. Does it change how I feel about this comeback? Not really – it’s all subjective in the end.

What makes you, You.

I have some “american cheese” for you to conclude my thoughts here (at least for now). The kind of relationship with music I have is certainly a more universal feeling than I’d like to believe. However, it’s not a bad thing at all. In fact, your personal sensibilities is what makes this medium so vast and powerful. 

Whether it’s an entire opus of your favourite classical composer, a guitar solo that shreds so hard your parents would yell at you to switch it off or a beat that makes your body groove in a strange otherworldly compulsion. You can ascribe it to the emotion, the feeling or even your own personal story you associated with this one particular song.

When it matters the most, only you know what it is that you need from music, and that’s why I care about it so damn much.